For You
by D. melanogaster
Summary: Ginny knew Harry would come to find her once the battle was over. He did. Now he has some explaining to do. PostDH, contains spoilers. ONESHOT.


**For You**

Ever since he had saved her mother's life and whipped off the Invisibility Cloak, Ginny had known he would win. Never mind that he had died, that he was supposed to be dead, that she had no idea what had happened – she had known he would win.

She had also known that he would come to find her once it was over. It had taken him longer than she had thought it would, with everyone in the castle wanting to talk to him, but he had found her eventually. She didn't know if it was a good or a bad thing that it had taken him over a day to get to her. He came to her on the second evening since the battle had ended.

She had been sitting by the lake, in a place very conveniently hidden from anyone who didn't know it was there, when he had just calmly walked right next to her and sat down on the grass.

The sun was setting, dyeing the sky gloriously red and gold. Even though Ginny couldn't help but be reminded of all the blood that had been shed so recently – she doubted she would ever be able to look at anything red again without becoming ill – she couldn't tear her eyes away from the sunset. It simply was too beautiful. It was almost surreal that something like this could exist after all that had happened, when it seemed there was nothing good left in the world.

The war had been won, she should have been happy. Voldemort was dead. The nightmare was over. They were free. And yet, she didn't feel at all relieved. It felt like another nightmare had begun, this one much more personal, and somehow a lot worse.

Fred was gone. Her mischievous, clever brother who had always found something good in everything and everyone was dead. She would have to learn to say "George" without adding "Fred". No more twins. Just one. It was unnatural.

Colin Creevey was also one of the many who had died that night. He had been one of her best friends, she had always partnered up with him in class. She would have to find a new partner for Potions now. She would never get a photographer for her wedding – she had promised Colin that he could do it, that there would be no one else. She wouldn't break that promise.

Harry hadn't said anything in the five minutes he had sat there. It was better that way, for Ginny felt like she would start crying if he spoke. She kept her eyes fixed on the sunset, determined not to let the tears start flowing. There was no one else on the grounds, it seemed. Nobody came to bother them as they sat in silence, both staring at the crimson streak of sky on the horizon.

"I'm sorry." It must have been ten minutes since he had arrived, and Ginny jumped at the sound of his voice. She had begun thinking that he wouldn't speak at all.

"For what?" Ginny asked, her voice hoarse because she hadn't used it at all that day.

"For everything," Harry answered simply. "For Fred, for what you've been through, for what I've put you through... For everything. I'm so sorry." His voice had faded to a whisper.

"Colin died, too," Ginny whispered back. She didn't know why she was whispering – no one else would have heard her even if she had shouted. Her eyes felt surprisingly dry, considering she had just stated what she had wanted to forget.

When she glanced at Harry, she was shocked to realise he was crying. His hair was sticking up in all directions, his clothes were torn and dirty and he looked like he hadn't slept properly since he had left the Burrow, but the tears were what shocked her the most. The hero of the wizarding world didn't cry. Crying was for mere mortals, for the weak – the Chosen Boy Who Lived Twice was stronger than the ordinary people.

But this wasn't the Chosen Boy Who Lived. This was the real Harry Potter, who had just lost a brother and his last link to his parents. He wasn't the hero everyone worshipped, and he did cry.

"I know," Harry replied, still whispering. "I saw Neville and Oliver carry him in. I saw Remus and Tonks, too." More tears slipped out from the corners of his eyes. "They shouldn't have died. It wasn't supposed to happen here. Voldemort wasn't supposed to find out we were here. So many students died..." His voice was broken and his hand shook as he ran it through his hair.

"But it did happen. He did find out. There's nothing we can do to change that now. We just need to never let anything like this happen again. We won't to forget them." His voice was growing stronger as he spoke these words that were obviously meant to comfort – Ginny just didn't know if they were supposed to comfort him or her.

"They would have died some day even without this war. Lupin, Tonks..." Ginny drew in a shaky breath, "even Fred. They fought for something they believed in, to give the rest of us a chance to live. They knew they could die. Blaming ourselves will not honour their memory – they knew what they were doing, they knew what was on the line."

Silence descended over them after her words. Again, Harry was the one to break it.

"You're right. Maybe it was their time to go." Ginny sighed as he didn't continue.

"Perhaps we could stop going over the clichés and you could tell me why you're here," she said tiredly.

"I missed you," Harry replied instantly. It seemed he had expected that question. "And I wanted to make sure you were all right. No one has seen you around today. Have you been here all day?"

Ginny briefly wondered if anyone had made sure Harry was all right – the tears were a clear sign that something was wrong with him – and then she started thinking about what he had just said. She snorted, disbelieving, glancing at Harry again. He had turned to face her and was looking straight to her eyes.

"All right? How could I be all right? My brother is dead! My best friend is gone! Voldemort and the Death Eaters have been making everyone's life a living hell while you've been off Merlin knows where, risking your own life daily just by being out there! Oh yes, we've all been – we still are – just splendid!" Ginny knew she was shouting, she knew she was being unfair – Harry really couldn't have done anything differently – but she didn't care. She needed an outlet and he was there.

"And how dare you just walk here and say you've missed me? I've been here all the time, you're the one who walked out on me! I waited for you, _for years, _then when it was convenient for you, you picked me up and once you got bored, you threw me away! It was you who left. You broke my heart and now we're supposed to just pick up where we left off?"

She could see he was still crying. They were quiet for a while – Ginny was waiting for him to get up and walk away again. But he didn't.

"I'm sorry, Ginny. I really am. I had no choice. I didn't want to go," he whispered. "But I came back, and I promise you, I'm never walking out on you again."

"Most of the time," Ginny started, her voice breaking, "I didn't know whether you were dead or alive. There were so many crazy rumours – some people said you had broken into the Ministry, and later into Gringotts. None of us knew what to believe. And yesterday, when Voldemort said you'd died, but you hadn't... It's been so confusing. A part of me is ready to wake up and find we actually lost the war."

"It wasn't easy for us, either, being out there. We had no idea what was going on back home, we never got any news, we didn't know how you were doing. We couldn't just go and have lunch with the Order people – Voldemort had spies and allies everywhere... It was hard, but we had a job to do," Harry murmured, wiping away his tears. "And we actually did break into both the Ministry and the Gringotts. I can tell you those stories later."

He seemed afraid she wouldn't believe him – he took her hand to his and held on tightly.

"I promise you, I will explain everything. It's not so confusing when you know the whole story. We have time now. The rest of our lives. Just... please never doubt that we won the war. If we had lost, everyone would have sacrificed their lives for nothing. They didn't. We won." His emerald eyes were burning with determination, almost demanding her to promise to remember their loved ones hadn't died for nothing. She nodded. There was silence again, then Ginny realised something Harry had said.

"The rest of our lives?" She repeated, slightly stunned.

"I said I'm not going to walk out on you, and I meant it. I won't leave you again." Ginny couldn't help but smile at Harry's words – it was a weak smile, only a ghost of her radiant grin, but it was her first real smile since Bill and Fleur's wedding.

"I'm going to hold on to that promise," she said. The corners of Harry's mouth were slowly beginning to turn upwards. "But if you're planning on making me wait for the explanation for a lifetime..."

Harry chuckled and shook his head.

"Once we've had some sleep I'll tell you everything," he said. The silence was back. This time it was a comfortable one. It was broken when Ginny was suddenly reminded of something that had been gnawing at her insides all day. She had to know. This couldn't wait.

"You sacrificed yourself for us. You said it yourself, to Voldemort. You willingly went there to die. Why did you do that?" Now there were tears in her eyes. It had been both alarming and touching to hear Harry would have given his life for them. Right now, it only seemed frightening.

"I had to do it. There's a long story there... It was a part of the mission Dumbledore gave me. If I hadn't done that, Voldemort would still be alive," Harry answered, speaking slowly and quietly, carefully considering each word. "I didn't want to tell any of you beforehand... I found out that I needed to do that right after Fred had... I didn't want to say goodbye, it would have been too much for all of us. And I knew you would have stopped me."

"Dumbledore told you to get yourself killed?" Ginny asked, her voice extremely dubious. "And what do you mean, you had to do that? What did it matter for Voldemort, other than the obvious?"

"I told you, it's part of the whole explanation. There was a part of me that had to die so Voldemort could." Ginny stared at him, not quite knowing whether to believe it or not, as he spoke.

"Something in you had to die so Voldemort could die? Are you saying you had something in you that would have kept you from killing him?" Her voice was shrill and she knew she must have looked like Harry had lost his mind. He nodded, calmly looking to her eyes.

"I'm saying that there was something in me that would have kept Voldemort alive. Something I needed to get rid of." It sounded like he was talking about the weather, the way he mentioned it in a way that would have seemed casual to anyone who didn't know him. She, however, knew him better than most, and could tell he was repulsed by whatever it was. She took a deep, shaky breath to steel herself.

"You had a part of Tom Riddle in you." It wasn't a question. Harry only nodded to confirm it.

"But it's gone now." He nodded again.

"And you'll give me the full story later?" Another, more perceptible nod.

"All right." She took another deep breath and blew it out. "All right. I trust you. I don't need an explanation right now."

"Ginny, listen, I know this is a lot to take in, even a small part like that –" Ginny cut him off before he could make an excuse and leave. She held her hand up and shook her head warningly.

"No, you can listen; I'll do the talking for now." Harry cringed slightly at her words, obviously expecting some sort of a telling off. "I trust you with my life. Hell, I'd trust you with anyone's life – I let you take my brother on that insane mission of yours, didn't I? If you say whatever evil you had in you is gone, I believe you. And don't beat yourself up because I said 'evil'. Voldemort was evil, you're not. You never were, not even when – whatever it was – was there."

She squeezed on his hand comfortingly and gave him a small smile.

"I trusted you when you had some of him in you. You're a good person. It's always been your heart that's in control of you. Always." Her whispered words were barely loud enough to hear, but Harry seemed to hear them perfectly. He smiled gratefully and pulled her into a hug.

"You have no idea how good it is to hear that," he murmured to her hair.

They sat there, hugging, for quite a long time. The sun had set and it was beginning to get dark. After a seemingly endless moment of peace where neither one of them spoke or moved, Harry apprehensively let go of her and moved back. He turned to look at the lake instead of her.

"You know… I was thinking about you when Voldemort was about to kill me." His voice was suddenly quiet again. It seemed he had been debating on whether to tell her or not, and now he was carefully weighing each word, so that it would come out the way he wanted it to. Ginny just gaped at him, not knowing what to reply.

"I was scared when I walked there, but when I thought of you, I wasn't. Not anymore. I remembered your face and how it felt like to kiss you… And I thought that if I died so you could live, it would be okay." His voice was shaking slightly – he suddenly seemed very nervous. "Just walking there and dying because I had to was frightening, but dying to save someone I love didn't sound so bad."

He was still holding her hand and the tight grip was almost painful, but Ginny didn't care. For the first time since Sirius had died, the tears in her eyes were tears of happiness. _Harry loved her._

"I'm glad I didn't die, after all. I would have done it without complaint, for you, but… living for you is better." Ginny brought her free hand to his cheek, carefully turning his head so he was looking at her.

"I love you too," she whispered with a small smile as her tears ran down her cheeks. "Thank you, Harry. For coming out here to make sure I was all right, for getting rid of Voldemort, for dying for me… but most of all, thank you for coming back to me."

"No problem," Harry replied quietly. Ginny knew he was being serious – she could see it in his eyes that it really would be no problem for him to do that again, for her. She opened her mouth to say something, even though she didn't quite know what – perhaps thank him again – but he cut her off before she had made a sound.

"I'm not a patient person," he began with a smile, "and as I think we've already gone through everything we need to say right now, I'm going to have to ask you to shut up and let me kiss you."

Ten or so minutes later, when they were getting back to the castle, Harry's arm wrapped around her shoulders, Ginny couldn't help smiling. She was all right now. Even though the last 48 hours had been horrible, something good had come out of it all. She had Harry back. There would be a time to grieve the losses – right now they had a party to get to. Now, it was the time to celebrate the victory.


End file.
